Sunday, July 8, 2007

feels good to be back !!

Wow !! Its been almost 2mths since i have been away from everyone.

First of, I WOULD LIKE TO SAY A BIG VOTE OF THANKS TO ALL OF YOU THAT SENT THEIR LOVE, ADVICE, PRAYERS AND CONCERN. I wont start to mention names but y'all know who u are. And for those that contacted me personally, thanks can never be enough. And most importantly I would like to thank my Father up in heaven for the gift of life and for being my pillar of strenght. what award did i win again??

I really felt guilty for leaving like that again. I know some may have even given up on my blog. i think even I gave up on myself. I can only ask that y'all bear with me. Oh, not becos i have issues but we all get tired and lazy sometimes. But this my own laziness get one kind sha:)

Anyways, I am still very married. I have gotten somekind, n i say somekind of closure form my last episodes. Abeg I am not the only one alive so the devil better watch himseff and stay on vacation permenantley. Well that is my prayer n I am sticking with it.

If i say i haven't lost the urge to blog i would definatley be lying.

Also i kinda got tired of always blogging abt some craziness or the other. But then if I don't do my rants and ravings here where else will I do it. I figure it is better here than me bottling it all up sha.

So i will try to work on keeping it clean and happy. So happy thots happy thots (thats me meditating).

If i occasionally start my wahala stories, bear with me abeg. Thats just life dishing its usual and besides ain't drama good read anyways?

So on the up side, the girls are doing so well in school. Extremely well adjusted. Infact they get upset when we come pick them up. Especially olivia. She practically slams down whatever she is holding n grudgingly picks up her things. It can't mean nothing but she is happy where she is right?

work is great. but not without its drama. i know already right? what do u expect when u work with women. ok i must make a diclaimer before saying this but especially when they r all white. i fell like i constantly have to watch my back and cover my ass. i think they feel threatened by me. some of them i don't even understand .especially one who constantly compars herself to me n is kinda jealous cos i am new n i have neem given quite a load of responsibility. she has been there longer but the thing is hello, u only have a certificate n i bagged the degree! she practically sulks all day but i just ignore here n do my work. After all thats what iam there for. maybe i will psot abt work next blog. this was supposed to be a quick update not another rant session. i have already started with drama. at least i tried it wasn't in the ist nor 2nd paragraph:)
I like what i do so far so thats the most important part actually not the paycheck at the end of the week is the good part.

All my weddings went well. The girls where actually in two. all out of town. so a goos portion of my checks has been going into weddings n things. i am swearing off weddings for the rest of the year. even though i still have two more but i may have to just shenk them cos they r both in naija. my hubby will just kill me. i really went overboard with the last two weddings. hmm that sounds like another happy post for another day. i would have put up picks but i am sure u all understand my trying to keep my identity well under wraps. i give u'all a pretty good amt of inof abt me that i would never reveal to anyone else so just enjoy the priviledge.

hmm what else? well this was just mean to be an update so i will keep it simple and sweet.

so here share a toast with me. to happy new beginings and endings. here here. my glass of greygoose and cranberry is getting empty. so gotta go refill.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

The devil vacations

i was supposed to be back to blogging. with full joyfull accounts of my new job, how things haev been working out n all. but i think i got swiped by the devil. i was too slow i guess u snooze u loose. i should have taken my chance while the devil was on vacation.

well, the Devils back. maybe he had a terrible vacation somewhere n chooses to use me as a ounching bag cos he sure isd hitting hard n below the belly.

the or5iginal good news was that the jobs going very well. counldn't have asked for better at this time. the kids r extremely well adjusated at shcool. they seemed to fit right in.

now the other news is, i know this might coemas a shocker cos i think i am still really in disbelief.

hubby left us yesterday. yep i mean he packed his bags n he left. don't know where he is. i don't know where to start but the bottom line is i came back home to chaos. i opened his cellphone bill like i always do n noticed it was unsually high. brough it to his attention though he was kinda upset that it was that high, when i voluntered to take it up with the company, he kinda blew it off.

well i did investigate, i couldn't let it go. well i did find what i was looking for n more. over six mths worht of phone calls n text messages to 2 particular numbers that i did not recognize. at odd hr of the day. got acess to a couple of his text messages asking a certain female to be his friend again n then arrangements for them to meet.

i confronted him. we went thru the usual men bullshit. trying to turn things around on me. he eventually volunteerd that she was just a friend n she was going thru a rough time. blah blah blah. so who appointed u father xmas or better still i was aware that u had changed professions n become a therapist.

looked thru his phone book n ther n behold was the number stored under his guy friends name. i guess his friend had allof a sudden moved from maryland to atlanta cos now he has a atlanta number stored under his name.

yes i am airing out all my dirty laundry here. cos i wont tell anyone yet not even my mom. i don't think i can stand any i told u so right now. n i don't think i need the barage of phone calls either.

anyways, we kinda tralke d abt it. he begged me to let it go. then he called me at work the next day just to let me know that i had caused the girl to be kicked out of where she was staying. what the fuck!!! how in the world is that my problem?

yes i had called her in the midst of our argument so we could all tlak n get everythign out int he open. ofcourse he wouldn't so i ended up calling twice n hanging up cos he wouldn't say anything. but i guess her boyfriend or husnabd or whatever did not find it funny n maybe there ahd been other issues but that really isn't my concern. obvisously he must have felt she was doing something dirty b4 he went to the extent of kickign her out.

now back to my pwn problem. all hell has broken loose at this pt. i had been mentally preparing my self to find a way to work things out. according to hime it as nothing sexualn she was just a friend. silly me.

anyways i get home from work. n he is asking us to put this behind us. ok i am like fine. but i need to kown what happened. what is her name? how did u meet n what happened.

my husband became mute oh! refused to talk. all he was concerned abt was how i found out n why was i going thru his phone records.

at the end of the day. i hotld him i would move on if i could but what am i moving on from?. what happened? still wouldn't talk. told him that at this pt if he can't let it go n be more forthcoming and open abt it then obviosuly it was more serous than he makes it out to be n it means more to him. he had a choice to make at this pt. its either her n her kid or me n mines.

he's packed some of his things n gone. not a word.

its mothers day n i sure as hell don't know where my husband is.

i haven't cried or anything. i am not scared either i think i am still just in shock.

i guess part of me thinks he will be back at the same time part of me is begining to think abt what i am going to do with these kids. i sure as hell can't afford this darn mortgage with the girls tuition n other household bills.

i guess i better being realistic n start looking for an apartment. i am not moving back home cos i just started this job n i really like it. its given me the break that i have been looking for.

i have alot going on in my head right now n i probably won't be blogging for a while till i get things in some sort of order.

sooo, i am signign off yet again for another while. i guess till the devil goes on vacation again

Wednesday, May 2, 2007

my bad

sorry all. i am still here in austin n i only have internet access at work. n i keep reading all these memos n emails abt not using the internet for personal business so i try to limit my use.

i will be back home friday. tomorrow is my last day at work here in austin so i will be back on my blog pretty soon.

missed my blog fam. hope y'all have been good. haven't even had a chance to read anybodys blog 4 the last 2wks i think except for omara's

tata y'all. will be back

Friday, April 13, 2007

As it all begins

wow! this has surely been a hectice week. I even only managed to squeeze the gym in once so far. considering i try to keep to a minimum of 3-4 times a week. Don't worry its a pretty new resolution. i haven't been holding out on u'all that much.

I have been visiting and touring preschools all week for the girls. I knew this time would come pretty soon, and I was actually doing my research slowly but now its come to push or shove. I blogged abt some interview a while back. (omara if u remember we talked abt it) but anyways i finally got a callfrom them on tuesday. And i am quite sure its due to my persistent stalking. But non the lest, I finally got that call n they want me to start nxt tuesday. Ok see what i have put on my self. i have been praying abt it n i asked God to do it speedily but i don't quite think I thot it would be soo soon.

So hence, I am left with the dilema of what to do with the girls. I t really shouldn't be that hard considering that there are gazillions of schools nested around but thats the problem really too many n li know nothing abt them. no recs form peopel cos i don't know anyone in the area. Yeah I am pretty much a home buddy n a loner. I didn't even know that my nxt door neighbour of over a yr now actually has a daughter thats around the girls ages. she's going to be 4 later this yr. n i am seriuos she lives at the next house on my left. not a couple of houses of over. didn't know till yesterday when i was out on the front yard trying to spark a new hobby. gardening. anyways the little girl n her dad where walking towards us n i noticed the girls had stopp picking up the leaves i had asked them to n where focusing on something else, as i looked up, i saw them all walking towards the little girl big grins on their face. she was holding out a golf ball in her hand that she had found and was beckoning them to come take a look. anyways long story short thats how i found out they lived nxt door

so where was I again? anyways, i asked the girls pediatrician and dentist and they recommended a couple like that their job. but i amgrateful they had some. so i started wiv those ist then embarked on the rest.

if i should blog abt the whole school process in its entirety, this will be one hella of long blog. but i will spare u. maybe nxt blog. but i do know i never thot it would be this hard. but u know what, i often find it extremely annoying shopping for the girls cos most often time i can't find three of the same size esecially in shoes so i really shouldn't have been surprised that i got alot of oh its so late in the school yr n we don't have three spaces. so what do u want me to do? do ini mini mani mo n leave one of the girls at home?

some of the places i went to schould be called daycare or babysitters. i mean u can tell that they probably don't do much but sleep n play. I want a place where my kids r going to be challenged. shoo let them come home with home work n mommy will have to take a steo back to see if she is smarter than a preschooler (lol) any one wathces that show?

I swear i wish i could send the girls back home to school. i so much chericsh the education n the standard that we were held to back home. i think by 2 at least, we had started school. my hubby who hasn't ever been in naija, has so much respect for the system. he actually suggested it first. but i will absolutely not part wit my babies. then there is the option of me going with them, what in d world am i supposed to do back home? all my immediate family is here in the states.

anyways after all the headache n heartache of falling in luv with one school to be told that they had to have been three by last september b4 they can enter the 3 yr old class. what d fuck. why call it the threee yr old clas? thats soo misleading. it should have been called the pre 4. or the i don't have three spaces ot i don't have partt time space. bla bla blah. I finally found my diamond in the rough.

Its abt 15 mins from the hosue with no traffice but 4 miles from hubbys office. it has the three day program cos my schedule is for three days a week so i have a four day weekend. oh just the best. couldn't have asked for better. its a private christian school. the class size is very small. ratio of 1:6. they had three spaces. oh i mean they made the three spaces. they actually moved two kids up to the nxt class cos just to accomodate us. but the kids where ready to be moved up anyways academically n maturity wise. n actually they really only had to move one but the other third one had togo too cos they were best friends n they didn't want to be seperated. worked perfectly. even though i will be shelving out more than i really want to , but they r my babies they deserve nothing but the best. i think they also had diversity to the program. cos i didn't see any other black kids as i toured. oh well!

everything seemed to be falling in place till i got a call today from my employers that they would be moving 2weeks of my training to austin. Big SHIT. i don't know if that man will cop with the girls n taking care of them n gettignthem up ready for school. he can hardly wake up on time on his own in the am. i am virtually his alarm clock.

i have thot of sending them to my mom in md, but 1, she works 2, the tickets r ridiculous last minute. i am going to have to come back on the weekend n go back just for peace of mind n i still have to figure something else out for during the week.

i have been praying to join the world of working moms out there but now that i can practically taste it, i don't know. 2wks away from home!!! i know omara, u r probably saying peace of cake. :)

Sunday, April 8, 2007


Another sereis of reality tv hits nigeria
nigerias next top model.
would love to watch it. dont know when its being aired but i do know that anyone who went to boarding school in nigeria will agree that bunch of women living together under the same roof will definatley brew some drama.
u should read peoples reactions to this.
p.s i just finally figured how to add pics. my next conquest is videos. wish me luck

Wednesday, April 4, 2007

back to the basics

i started out blogging so i can chronicle my adventures as a mother of multiples living the life as a suburbia housewife n i was reading thru my prior blogs n only found 2 at most mentioning or talking abt the girls.

not that there is ever a dull moment with them, its actually the contrary. there is always something new n fun or some headaches n those many moments that i wish i could just take then back to the doctor and ask for a refund. oh well, i think he's policy probabaly doesn't allow for refunds anyways.

my latest battles besides the one over veggie eating is tantrums. i know all ye moms out there r already nodding ur heads n saying been there done that. i know the girls r just three. oh btw, they turned three on saturday, but i just cannot stand the temper tantrums especially when we r out. i can definately handle it when we r home. thats no problem.

like i said in earlier posts, my husband n i definatley believe in discipline. abeg spare the rod n spoit the child seems to be our motto. trust me. we don't resort to spanking all the time. we go thru the stages or phases. we talk it thru. but they r only 3 do they really understand? i think for the most part they do. if that doesn't seem to work, then we threaten to take away the things they love. its funny but i have to threaten them with different things.

with olivia, thats my supermodel/fashionista. when i put them to bed at nite, she gets up goes thur their closet modeling all her clothes. needless to say she is never in her pjs when i go back in the morning. she has a pretty good fashion sense too, she matches when i find her in the morning n when i go shopping, u should see her go thru the racks like she's on a missiosn. when i try something on, she tells me mommy, its cute. So u guessed right when she gets in trouble, i threaten to take away all her clothes n give them to the homeless if she does it again, u should see her start to cry n shake her head n the look in her eyes.

with ophelia, she loves her sunglasses. she sleeps in them, its war to get her to take it off even for baths n she has quite a collection of them so its easy. i go staraight for the sunglasses.

oralia, loves to go to the gym. mummy mummy wanna go to gym. all day long. sometimes i go even when i am not really planning on it just to get her off my back. its kinda a good thing for me though. i guess she loves the play houses n all the other things they get to do. i always wondered why they r soo hungry n tired when i pick them up. shoo i think they get more of a workout than i do.

so after the threatening phase, if they do something really bad, i ask them to hold out their hands and smack the back of it. just once or twice. it seems to do the trick.

but it gets tricky when we r out n u all know how things r. don't let one busy body see u spanking ur kids outside n they call child protective services right away. so i try not to in public. i may however sneak some pinches away from the watchful eyes of people or take them into the bathroom. but soemtimes i may not have that luxury.

for example, one of the thigns we did for their bday was chucky cheese. now, one of the rides takes pictures of u while u are on it. olivia and oralia were on it. so of course they were both in the picture. olivia always being her controlling self. was already yelling thats my picture even b4 the picture came out. so anywyas there was a squable over the picture. olivia then takes it upon herslef to throw a tantrum right there on the floor with everyone watching. needless to say it was embarassing, then my inpatient mother in law who forgets that they r just kids n will act out everyonce in a while starts gettign quite agitated that she is displaying such in public. if she had let me handle the situation, i probably could have gotten her settled alot sooner or just simply escaped to the restroom. i think every one knows there is no reasoning per say with an angry child like that. i mean she was screaming the roof down. eventually we end up abandoning the party cos she took her outside n we just decided to leave as the whole mood had been spoilt. can u imagine she didn't even want to ride with us back home, my mother in law that is. i guess its too embarassing to be associated with us. luckliy my brother inlaw was there so he took her home. whatever!!!!

so back to my point, i really want to nip this tantrum thing in the butt b4 it gets out of hands. any suggestions?

another thing that i have been struggling with is the thumb sucking. my husband is sooo particular abt that. he is so concerned abt them having an over bite n then needing braces. well their dentist says she will be very concerned after 4 cos then they would start getting their permanent teeth in. but its better if we start trying to get them to stop now.

the last time i tied their thumbs up so that they wouldn't suck it, the whole house did not sleep that nite. they tossed n turned n cried all nite. at abt 4a.m, my husband stormed out of bed n yanked the things of. he had to be at work in the morning and had had enough.

so any pointers on that would be appreciated too.

its gettign a little harder to keep them all in the same ouftit. cos they r begining to want to do their own things. i wonder how much longer i'll be able to keep dressing them the way i want.

and last but not the least, i can't teach them how to peddle for the life of me. they got a bike for xmas, n they r still sitting brand new in their paly room cos they won't peddle. i am not the most patient person so i must admitt i kinda gave up on that. besides shouldn't that be a daddy's thing.

Monday, April 2, 2007

its official, the war has begun

i got a call abt 10.45 p.m, it was my aunt calling to tell me that if her son came to me n asked me to accompany him to naija to get married in december, i shouldn't anwser him. everyone in the family has been banned from having anything to do withthis so called wedding.

i see the coward of a boy has fianlly fessed up to my aunt abt his wedding plans. can u imagine, my aunt says she calle dhim to come take her to a birthday party, then on the way in the car he told her, mom i am planning on getting married in december in naija. just thot i'ld let u know.

then he goes on to say after all when u were getting marreid, did ur own mother tell u when to get married or when u were ready to get married.

my ist question to my aunt was did she give him a dirty slap. what kind of question is that.

u know maybe b4 i became a mother, the question or remark may not haev bothered me but i can just imagine one of my girls saying that to me. ludacris i say.

anyways, the war is officially on now. my aunt is even calling all his friends that she knows that they must not go to naija with him. i don't know what good that would do though. seems like his mind is made up.

my own thing is i just can't get over what kind of family plans a weddign for their daughter without the grooms family coming to ask for ther hand in marriage. how can they plan a wedding knowing that no one in the grooms family is going to show up for.

well kudos to my cousin sha cos it sure as hell takes guts to be a lone ranger like that.

i really feel like my aunt should call her parents n let them know that hey have heard of the proposed wedding n tell them how they feel abt it. afterall r they wishing them dead that they would hold a wedding while they r hale n hearty in their absence. i am sure they wouldn't stand their own kids doing the same to them.

how do u tell ur parents that u r gettign married n just telling them for their information. aren't u supposed to sit them down, with or without the girl n let them know that this is where u r n this is what u would like to do n then talks commence from there.

i say the boy has lost it. my uncle says nko imi wani ibe. there is soemthing else behind this. oju lasan ko. this is beyond what the mere eyes can see.